What are Some Symptoms of Low Self-Esteem?

Do not live in "Always" and "Never."

Always is for learning, and never is for giving up.

I'll Never Amount to Anything

Invariably, people with low self-esteem are uncomfortable with success. They tend to believe that they don’t deserve success, and they have no clue as to how to savor success. At the same time, they do not hesitate to blame themselves if things go wrong. They might take pleasure in telling the world that they knew things would go wrong. This is an important symptom of low self-esteem and needs to be treated as early as possible. Be careful with the word never. We are not the holders of infinity.

I'm Never Good Enough

People suffering from low self-esteem also have the habit of putting themselves down. They repeatedly tell themselves that they are not good enough and that they are bound to fail. Over a period of time, this negative self-talk turns into a negative self-belief. More than that, they try and implant these seeds of negativity in people around them, looking to justify their beliefs with "evidence" of proof. They also gravitate towards people who suffer from similar problems. The end result is that they feed on each other’s negativity and become much poorer individuals than they initially were. Be careful with the word never. We are not the holders of infinity.

I'm Always a Failure

A high level of dissatisfaction is another indicator of low self-esteem. There are people who spend all their time complaining, at least, in their minds. They neither see a positive thing in others nor in themselves. This cynicism eats away their self-belief and erodes their self-confidence. In contrast, people who value their abilities enjoy high self-esteem. Be careful with the word always. We are not the holders of infinity.

I'm Never Happy

Also, people with low self-esteem spend most of their time dwelling in the past and worrying about the future. They don’t spend enough time living in the present. As a result, they don’t enjoy the present, even though it may be full of success. The net result is that they prevent themselves from enjoying life and make themselves unhappy. It finally becomes a vicious cycle that feeds upon itself, and prevents them from breaking out of their negative mindset.

Such people are rarely relaxed and at ease. They keep looking for different jobs and lines of work. The reason why they are always looking for something else to do is that they are lacking self-confidence. They drift from one crisis to another, and might blame fate for their woes. But this rarely helps them in the long run. They fail to consistently generate a sustainable feeling of happiness and contentment. Be careful with the word never. We are not the holders of infinity.

I'm Always Alone

People with low self-esteem also have problems getting close to others. They are not comfortable with intimacy or closeness and create barriers to prevent people from coming close to them. Fear of rejection without self-esteem or confidence becomes the viewpoint of relationships. They don’t like to open up to people and to reveal their innermost thoughts. They may be nursing some old bad experience with someone who caused them a lot of pain or who let them down when they were most vulnerable. By forcing themselves to live in a world of self-denial, there could be great damage to themselves. They fail to benefit from the company of others, especially positive relationships, and keep entrenching themselves deeper and deeper into a negative mindset. They may ultimately reach a stage where they may be declared beyond salvage by others.

Anyone with low self-esteem needs our help to bring their beautiful gifts to the surface and find confidence again. This help can be given by family members, friends, teachers or by trained psychologists. Believe it or not, a person with low self-esteem can build confidence even by themselves. Be careful with the word always. We are not the holders of infinity.

I'm Always the Problem

We live in world where it is ok to believe “it’s just me.” “No one else feels the way I do and has any of the issues I am facing.” “It is just my problem and is probably all my fault.” “If only I were not terrible at everything, maybe things could have been better for my life.”

These are lies. These are beliefs which have been changed because of poor evidence. Evidence based on circumstances, combined with low self-esteem. Low self-esteem says you are not good enough, it is all your fault, and you are getting what you deserve because of all the other people on the earth who are more qualified than you. Inevitably, individuals with low self-esteem struggle with confidence and maximizing their gifts and talents to share with the world. This limiting belief becomes the new starting point for cycles of self-doubt, fueled by negative self-thoughts. Be careful with the word always. We are not the holders of infinity.

What can we do to begin overcoming low self-esteem?

YOU . ARE . AWESOME .

Here’s one quick reframing tip which can work for everyone, whether you struggle with low self-esteem or not. When you wake up in the morning, take one short moment to look in the mirror and say out loud to yourself (and look yourself in the eyes), “You’re amazing!” It will feel awkward, but if you step into that space of saying one positive thing out loud to yourself each day, you will have one more positive thought to remember throughout your day no matter what comes. You could use any positive statement if you like, it is the positive action which sticks in your brain. And using “you’re” instead of “I’m” takes a bit of the edge off. Eventually, try using statements like “I’m awesome” and notice the confidence which comes from deliberately telling yourself something positive.

I’m proud of you. If you are reading this, you are taking your self-esteem and health seriously. YOU are awesome!

Moving Forward

Your first step to increasing your self-esteem is to start today. Each day you delay is another day the past wins. However you choose to begin building your self-esteem, do so today! Be thorough and consistent with the process and be aware it may take a while. You should not become impatient or despondent if you find your self-esteem slipping. Choose to have grace with yourself. Remember, you are an important and worthy person and should treat yourself as such.

If you are willing to share a bit about your journey in self-esteem, comment below and let me know what you have learned. Sign up to follow the blog. There is more to come. Share some encouragement with others you know by sharing this blog with them. We are a community of humans who are working to love ourselves past our old fears, one step at a time.

I am one call away for YOU. Book a Free Call with me and we can build our self-esteem together. Together, we are better.

Moving You Forward

Book a Free Call